Well, it's that time again - time to bounce up and down on some old dude's lap in the hopes that he'll give you presents. We call it "Christmas" (Kevin calls it "Tuesday"), and this year we're only wishing for two things:

1. A new drummer. Yes, as many of you have heard Johnny is leaving Divided Sky to pursue less hazardous pastures. He's playing now with the sultry Soraia, and we suggest you check them out (and tell Johnny he owes me 5 bucks and a waffle). In the meantime, the sensational Scott "Rad" Radway (Now Soon Nowhere, ex-Divided Sky) is filling in on drums. The last couple shows have been called both "oh my god" and a sort of caveman grunting that defies transliteration. Which brings us to x-mas wish number B:

10. YOU to come to our shows. Not only did we incorporate our old drum master Scott "i played on the album" Radway, but we also added a brand NEW song, a brand NEW cover, and soon we shall unveil our latest triumph, a needlessly large weather machine No! I can't tell you, it's too secret. But rumours of holiday hijinks, guest stars, and more unconventional covers abound. So it's up to YOU to come out and support Divided Sky. We've met a lot of cool people at shows in the past year and had a lot of good times, so let's keep it going.

We're playing the Arena this Saturday the 23rd, and the Pennant (NJ) and Le Grand Fromage (AC, NJ) on the 28th and the 29th, respectively. That's 3 chances to give Divided Sky the best gift in the world - your happiness.

Happy Holidays!

We apologize for the late notice, but our show on the 17th has been cancelled due to some unforseen scheduling issues. Hopefully this doesn't cause anybody any undue distress. If you're real hopping mad and want to tell us about it, why don't you come to the Now Soon Nowhere, Day Without Dawn, Athem and Janus Wake show that night instead? It's at the Arena, It'll be a good time, and we'll be there supporting our buddies.

P.S. Come to the Grape St. show!

Our show at Grape Street next week has been moved. Here is the new show info:

Divided Sky
Tuesday November 7th 2006
Grape Street
4100 Main Street, Philadelphia, PA 19019 (Manayunk)
21+

While this will be sad news for those of you who have already purchased your life vests and flare guns, there's good news for you as well. At that very show, DS will be performing some BRAND-SPANKING NEW MUSIC! Oh no, you say, I've barely had time to absorb all the awesomeness of The Subtle Art of Failure! Whatever shall I do? The answer is, you best come out to the Grape Street show, fool! Not only will we blow you away with our mad hella tight new stuff, we'll also unleash un petit surprise-o - that's Japanese for "AWWW YEAH!!"

You literally can't afford not to see the excitement, so start planning now!

The Firestation 8 show has been moved from the 18th of September to the 27th. The stated reason was that MD needs extra time to prepare their disaster relief efforts. Best stock up on that space herpes vaccine, guys!

Other schedule information has been updated... bands have been announced, times have changed... can YOU find all 6 differences?

In case you are unaware, some nice reviews of our new album have been coming in, and they are available for your reading pleasure in our press section. We're simultaneously relieved, surprised, and grateful (and a little hungry) that people seem to be enjoying our work.

Apparently, the only one who doesn't like it is [god/the goddess/nature/inexplicable mystical entropic force/FSM], who has waved [his/her/its/its/Its] [hand/foot/craggy bower/uncaring tendrils/noodly appendage] and brought some kind of crazy "hurricane" to the North Carolina area just as we're attempting to go to Prog Day there and promote our album. Coincidence?

Assuming we survive the trip, we'll be playing some shows in our brand spanking new lineup soon. We are tremendously excited (while simultaneously tremendously scared of the [fearsome/awesome/sublime/mysterious/delicious] forces arrayed against us) to debut the Glock/Chops rhythm section, and you should be too! We're pretty sure you'll be blown away... either by the powerful grooves or the winds reaching 225 miles per hour. But enough about Jonny's gas.

Anyway, check our press section to read the rants and raves, and then our schedule to plan a time to come see what all the fuss is about. We have more bookings in the works as well, so check back often (or join the mailing list so you can receive updates without even bothering yourself to expend the energy required to visit a website).

It takes quite a caliber of man to survive the Divided Sky audition process.

Sure, one has to hack their way through a few DS tunes and arrive approximately on time. Bathing optional. It goes without saying that the auditionee (?) should be reasonably if not fully dressed for the occassion, pants included. Bringing an instrument may also be "a good idea". Sure, many have tried. Many have auditioned well, pledged their allegiance to the DS cause and driven off into the night with a smile, a brand new CD or two of DS material "to learn for their next audition" and a supposed optimistic and excited attitude. As the tires screech and their vehicle erupts into the inky blackness, there is an unsettling feeling that creeps into the minds of the band as we smile and wave goodbye saying "see you next week". A feeling of grim realization that can mean only one thing: WE WILL NEVER SEE THAT HUMAN EVER AGAIN.

Much like Supermodels, expensive call girls and most governmental systems, perhaps it is in the nature of musicians to make lofty promises of commitment and dedication only to disappear without a trace and leave you with nothing more than your own shattered, limp-wristed dignity.

One man, however, did rise to the challenge. One man looked the music of DS square in the eye and said to himself a heroic and committed: "well, I guess so."

One man braved what modern science can only term as the "Bass Player Eating Vortex Right Down the Street From Divided Sky's Legendary Studio Surprise" or (technically as BPEVRDDtSFDSLSS). Many have failed where this one man has succeeded. His name: Kevin Mclaughlin. It is with great pleasure that we welcome Mr. Mclaughlin into the DS family as our new bass player. You may head here to visit his shiny and new member page.

Art Franklin has moved on to greener pastures and brighter vistas and we wish him much success after years of service, dedication, arboreal carnage and flaming wreckages. You may even get to see him on-stage with us at some point as DS administers a double bass aassault. Now wouldn't that be sumpthin'? Oh, and for you McLaughlin, welcome to being a marked man. You'll see.

We'll be showing our pale, pasty faces at this year's ProgDay and Prog in the Park Festivals. While we won't be performing, we will be hanging out selling merch, signing boobies and looking to chat about where it all went wrong. More info is available by looking at our schedule page. Lots of great performers at both festivals, so you have no excuse not to come down/up to see us!

ProgDay
Saturday September 2nd and Sunday September 3rd 2006
Storybook Farm
One Storybook Lane
Chapel Hill, NC 27516


Prog in the Park Day 1
Saturday October 7th
The German House
315 Gregory St
Rochester, NY 14620


Prog in the Park Day 2
Sunday October 8th
Water Street Music Hall
204 N. Water St
Rochester, NY 14604

Far not if you long to see us in action on stage again, as we are currently booking a series of showdates across the east coast, to be posted soon. Stay tuned!

What's better than watching Family Guy reruns or the horror classic "Mildly Irritated Scarecrow"? Watching the members of DS shamelessly demonstrate why there are no Emmys or Oscars over their fireplaces.

March your bootang over to the media page and check out our new video section. Demonstrations, guitar solos and subtle yet entirely bad comedy abound. We have more videos simmering on the stove, ready to be served up soon including interviews and commentary. Well, here's hoping that we uploaded the right videos. If the video starts and you see sexy sheep in frilly underwear, just kindly delete that from your hard drive.

Also, new reviews of "The Subtle Art of Failure" are posted in the press section of the Primer page! Check 'em out!

Due to an unfortunate confluence of events Divided Sky has been forced to cancel the gig at the Underground tonight. We apologize for any inconvenience caused by this; conversely, we take credit for any inconvenience alleviated by this. Some people knock over old ladies and baby carriages they're in such a hurry to get to DS shows! Some people enter catatonic states because they can't believe the awesome musicianship. Some people go home and break up with their girlfriends because the guys in DS are just too exotically sexy.

So believe us when we say it's better off this way. But don't fret, because there are other ways to get your DS fix. You can buy our shiny new CD, for example! In fact, you could buy a couple. Yeah, that's a good idea. You can go to our message board and post some insane ramblings in the hopes that we'll respond. You can call your favorite radio station and request they play them some Divided Sky. You can dust off your shrine to rising drum legend Jonny Chops. There are many things you can do... and in the near future there will be more, as we're working on some new surprises for our loving audience. So stay tuned!

Again, sorry for the last-minute cancellation... everybody enjoy your DS-free evening!

The kind folks at prog palace radio have decided to feature Divided Sky on their web radio broadcast this Saturday, May 13. the subtle art of failure will be played in its entirety, and we'll be in the chatroom fielding all the compaints. "Why does it sound like grandma screaming?" "Did you get permission from PETA before slaughtering that badger?" We'd better get used to it.

So tune in at progpalaceradio.com this Saturday from 7pm to 11pm EST. The album will start at 9, and is expected to run until at least 4:00am while we deal with power failures.

They said it couldn't be done. Some said it shouldn't be done. But we didn't listen, and now there is a new Divided Sky album for you to spend your allowance on.

Once again, Divided Sky puts the "die" in "dichotomy," as the CD release party was phenomenally successful and phenomenally diasastrous at the same time. Dying lights, failing power and exploding guitars all added up for an evening of unpredictable madness. But that same madness riveted the audience to their seats - or perhaps they were too scared to move?

Regardless, we had a great time, and are tremendously grateful to the RoSFest crew and everybody that came out to see us. Thank you all! RoSFest is still going on, and we're still there, so drop by our table to say hi (and buy a lot of stuff!). Our merch is selling like hotcakes, so get it while you can!

If you go to the commerce page, you'll notice that the subtle art of failure is now available for purchase via PayPal. That means that you, yes, YOU, can go ahead and buy it. Go on, don't be shy, now. You know you want it...

You can stop rubbing your eyes - unless your hands are made out of campaign promises you won't be able to see through them to see the bee-yoo-tee-ful NEW DIVIDED SKY WEBSITE. The Spectral colors got dropped like Britney's baby, and the site now sports the classy artwork from the soon-to-be-released album the subtle art of failure. Pretty nice, eh?

New features are still being developed, so the site will see some more updates in the near future. In the meantime, please check everything out and make sure it meets your satisfaction. Let me know if something's real broke, or if you have a suggestion for the new design. Or if you want to praise all of my hard work, feel free to do that too... or better yet, do it on the message board so all the ladies can see.

Of course, the very first thing you should do is head over to the media page and see if you notice anything different. I'll give you a hint - there's a new album there. With that album is a full track listing and full-length songs for free download. We're gonna release this sucker at the end of the week, so start yer drooling now.

Stay tuned for more exciting announcements and site updates. Things will be moving pretty quickly from here on out. First the site, then the space spores, then the world! Cobra La!

We are ridiculously excited to announce the Subtle Art of Failure CD RELEASE PARTY to take place during ROSFest 2006! Apparently all of our haphazard sacrificial ceremonies haven't been a waste of time after all! What better time to unleash our little monster (or our CD, for that matter) than during this prestigious and star-studded festival? We've been graciously given a big ol' 90-minute set during the Friday night afterparty, and we'll use that time to showcase our chops, our Chops, and possibly our chaps. So mark your calendars: on Friday, April 28th at 11:30pm Divided Sky will formally release our second full-length album to you, the unprepared listener, in a musical barrage that is guaranteed to make you wish you had worn your Depends. You'll need to buy a CD just so you can use the liner notes to wipe away the carnage... In a good way. So don your best clothes from two years ago and party like it's 2004. Here is the official release:

=====================================

Rosfest Post Party Friday Night Bash
Divided Sky CD Release Extravaganza

Friday April 28th 2006
11:30PM
21+
$10.00
Jester’s Sports Bar
2080 Bridge Street
Phoenixville Pa 19460
610-935-7141

Pennsylvania’s progressive rock/metal miscreants Divided Sky have chosen the Rites of Spring Festival Friday Night Bash Post Party as the place to unveil for the first time anywhere their brand new sophomore album “The Subtle Art of Failure”. Delivering intelligent, divergent hybrid-rock that is both unconventional and unpredictable, Divided Sky will take the stage at 11:30PM to deliver an electrifying live performance in support of the new album. Expect surprises aplenty with tons of freebies, giveaways and diabolical tomfoolery, not to mention the chance to be one the first living entities to get a shiny new copy of the jaw-dropping, pants-exploding goodness of "The Subtle Art of Failure!"

This CD release party will be the perfect wrap-up of the first night of the three day Rites of Spring Festival, an annual progressive rock celebration held at the Colonial Theater in Phoenixville Pennsylvania.

You best go get your heart medication because DS has TWO huge news updates in one single day (which in itself is huge news, so really we have THREE). Yes, it's hard to believe. Just remember to breathe.

First of all, as any one who's been paying any kind of attention already knows, Scott has left Divided Sky. There was no knifing, no on-stage fisticuffs, no gnashing of teeth (well, maybe a little gnashing). It was simply time for Scott to move on to other musical projects. In fact, he has already assembled one such project HERE which is currently going strong and will probably defeat us in single combat easily. We wish him the best, and reserve the right to say either "we told you so," or "oh god please take us with you" depending on how the future turns out.

Now, you're probably thinking "that kinda means you don't have a drummer, and you have all these shows and stuff coming up and oh no what are you going to do?!?!" Well, we were thinking that too (at least that's what we were thinking months ago when this all happened), until one day Jonny "Chops" Henrich came to a rehearsal and beat the crap out of his drums for us. After we recovered from the shock of somebody else actually showing up to a rehearsal, much less wanting to throw their lot in with us, we quickly welcomed him into the Divided Sky fold. Here are some Quick Jonny Chops facts:

• He is a crushing drummer - His drum heads are more battered than Jenna Jameson's face
• Jonny is a fightening fellow to watch as behind the kit as he beats more skins per minute than the combined prowess of Gene Simmons and Wilt Chamberlain. Expect an entertaining show, as Jonny certainly isn't afraid to put everything he has into his performance.
• He's good with the ladies, so maybe we'll have a go at this rock n' roll lifestyle before our ventillators give out.
• He now has an official Divided Sky member page! Check it out, before it checks you out.

Our other news update is too big to fit under this headline, so scroll up a little.

New performance dates have been announced for Divided Sky! Check out the new live dates HERE.

We are in the process of a major overhaul and mega update to the Divided Sky website. Ready your pants for new content, new announcements of upcoming live performances, new pictures and most importantly, NEW MUSIC!

After an unheard of 20 month gestation period, we have finally popped out album number two. Last week the completed mixes were Fed-Ex'd to Rare Form Mastering in Minneapolis, MN. In the capable hands of engineer Greg Reierson, this thing will sound huge and be well worth the wait. We are currently in the process of revamping this website to coincide with the release of the album as well as rehearsing our butts off to prepare the ol' stage legs again. New music, new performances and new faces (!) are all forthcoming so be patient. After all, failure is such a subtle art.